Ignatius J Reilly

Oh, my God! I can't believe the utter filth that I am reading! I do not in any way resemble that specimen of verbal excrescence they call Petri. No doubt the name derives from his place of origin. He has the intelligence and charm of something grown in a petri dish. He is an abomination, not worthy of scraping off the sole of my shoe! I must admit, his literary style shows promise, particularly when hurling invectives at the other mongoloids in that forum. If only his vocabulary can be enlarged and steered away from the drivel commonly found in science fiction scribblings. But he has no sense of order. No geometry, no theology. He most certainly has not read Boethius. That fact is obvious in his every inane utterance. Oh, Fortuna, what strange new ungodly terrors has your wheel cast me down among? How can these sub-humans compare my worldview, framed in the writings of the classical philosophers, with that moron, that insignificant speck of dust, that computer person! He probably has the same distorted, grotesque features as all such robotic creatures, from sitting for endless hours staring at their own intellectual reflection in a television screen. They obviously hope to enhance their image of themselves by trying to insinuate that one of their ilk is somehow comparable to me. As if I would ever have time to waste operating one of those absurd devices! I refuse to listen to this tripe any longer! My valve is on the verge of total collapse. I shall henceforth place all these loathsome creatures on my Ignore list, starting with that pompous self-declared perverter of the minds of the young, Jan15. That such a non-entity could dare to assume the role of teacher is yet another sign of this age of misguided technological nightmare. Cease and desist, you jackals! Return to the whip and dark room that is your rightful estate, or you shall feel the sting of my verbal wrath!